What Kind Of Sports Parent Are You?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 I was talking to a friend yesterday about Lauren’s season. I told her we are all getting rest and ready for another season in a few months, and  then she asked simply Why? I said why, what?  She said ,”Why get ready as if it is an appointment that can’t be missed”. My answer in part which lead to a bigger conversation was that “Lauren has a gift, I didn’t give it to her God did. It is our responsibility as parents, Henry’s and mine to nurture her gift to it’s full potential to the best of our ability and knowledge. I also nurture her other interests as well but you don’t recognize them  because they are not as prominent as her running but she is good at them all the same and enjoys them just as much.”

Not having children she is amazed at the time and effort parents place on sports and activities of our children. (I often wonder why she doesn’t have more free time LOL ) She was right we do place a lot of time, money and energy toward the things that our child wants to be apart of and we as well want to be a part of with her. That is what our family is about,just trying to be one ina world that doesn’t value family or the togetherness of one.

I have asked the question before and will continue how much is too much?To my friend “All Sports Parents” are a little overboard to the outsider who has no kids in a sport. To me some are, some are simply passionately allowing the child to develop their full potential. I guess you have to ask the child what do they think…Except that being honest, a child knows how you feel about the sport and often times wants to please you so that may not be the best barometer.

I gage Lauren by her enthusiasm for whatever it is she is into at the time and  her conversation about it.  Example: Although my desire was to have her cycle at the local velodrome on the off season.  When I signed her up I told her and then her face went blank, then I asked her if she wanted to do it again and her response was “If you want me to mom I will, but I really just want to stick with Volleyball for now”  Then she said okay I will do it  mom.I had her right there but I didn’t want her  to do it just for me .She had done it before and enjoyed it but, I know because we  were joining late and no friends were coming along she was reluctant to go this time around.Okay no cycling..I said all that to say this.

We parents have to check ourselves,we would be outraged if another questioned  our motives or intention toward our child so the only thing left is to self observe as much as possible and remember what it was like to be a child. The word  balance is an important one in the life of a youth athlete and the parents of one. The goal is not a gold medal at 10yrs old it is what every they can achieve as they get older and continue the pursuit of excellence in sports and academics.

My sister’s children are into tennis and almost every other sport they touch. They are naturally very good athletes and excel beyond most children that focus on just one sport. She brought my attention to the book (cover above) on Andre Agassi and his life in sports from the early age of I think at least 7 years old. It isn’t the prettiest story ,but one that needs to be told to help parents have balance in the sport lives of our children. I have never met a track parent personally like this but,unfortunate;y there probably is one  some where. Below is a very sad except from his book “Open” Here is more of the Autobiograpy

 

“I’m seven years old, talking to myself, because I’m scared, and because I’m the only person who listens to me. Under my breath I whisper: Just quit, Andre, just give up. Put down your racket and walk off this court, right now. Wouldn’t that feel like heaven, Andre? To just quit? To never play tennis again?

But I can’t. Not only would my father, Mike, chase me around the house with my racket, but something in my gut, some deep unseen muscle, won’t let me. I hate tennis, hate it with all my heart, and still I keep playing, keep hitting all morning, and all afternoon, because I have no choice. No matter how much I want to stop, I don’t. I keep begging myself to stop, and still I keep playing, and this gap, this contradiction between what I want to do and what I actually do, feels like the core of my life.

At the moment my hatred for tennis is focused on the dragon, a ball machine modified by my fire-­belching father and set up on the court he built in our yard in Las Vegas. Midnight black, mounted on big rubber wheels, the dragon is a living, breathing creature straight out of my comic books. It has a brain, a will, a black heart — and a horrifying voice. Sucking another ball into its belly, the dragon makes a series of sickening sounds. As pressure builds inside its throat, it groans. As the ball rises slowly to its mouth, it shrieks. And when the dragon takes dead aim at me and fires a ball 110 miles an hour, the sound it makes is a bloodthirsty roar. I flinch every time.”

 Mr. Agassi’s recollection is sad and distubing all at once. What will your child’s recollection of Track and Field be when  he looks back?

Related posts:

1. Should A Parent Begin To Sports Specify His/ Or Her Child Before 12-13 ?
2. Sports Parent Highlights
3. Track and Field Sports Parent Code of Conduct
4. The Best Track Parent is A Proactive One
5. 10 Ways To Be A Great Track Parent