Just Don’t Drop The Baton

 

U.S Olympic Team Dropping The Baton In Beijing

We parents of youth athletes are constantly in pursuit of using just the right words to encourage and instill confidence and a boldness to do their very best on and off the track. How do we get our kids to hear what we are saying and it make an impact? Do we say “JUST DONT DROP THE BATON”, “MAKE SURE YOU DON’T LOSE”, “MAKE SURE YOU DON’T LET HIM GET TO FAR IN FRONT OF YOU !”

As you were reading those staments what did you think of? Most likely your thoughts (focused on) exactly what the statement actually said not what to do right. Not the desired outcome of the statement intended. Psychologist Daniel Wegner calls  this”The ironic processs theory“ Telling ourself not to think about something, you can force your thoughts to the unwanted topic. The same holds very true for Playing to win versus, Playing not to lose.

When runners run not to lose they often lose. On the other hand running to win provides opportunities for the athletes-to do their best,even in a loss.   As parents we should practice reframing staments that could have a negative impact on our athletes.

Here are some examples, first the negative then the positive:

Don’t take off slow at the gun…….Take off fast and powerful like you know you can

Don’t hang around the curve jogging ….Run the curve with full intensity 

Don’t forget to drink lot’s of water out there today…..Make sure you drink water all day

Just don’t drop the baton this time……..Pass the baton just like in practice

Perhaps if the coaches(and athletes) would have focused more on getting it around and not  focus on dropping it  (again) the U.S would have brought home Gold instead of disappointment. I can’t say for sure .What I do know is that we as parents can help model positive talk and positive self talk to give our athlete every advantage to do his or her best. When we speak positive, we give opportunity for them to do the positive  behavior or performance we desire for them.

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